A Charming Little Shithole
It was a charming little shithole: a small town whose rustic beauty belied its backwardness. Anywhere else in the country, it would be full of mobile homes and mini malls. But in the verdant...
Category: Life
Slippery Slope
It was an odd winter. Every day above freezing. Every night below. The sleet and freezing rain came, melted a little, and refroze. Soon the whole St. Louis area was covered with three or...
A Stint in Stand-Up
After college, I was fumbling my way through life, looking for a career. Somewhere in the haze I got the idea to do stand-up. There was a comedy club in Lansing with an amateur...
Boston, We Have a Problem
Car problems can make a mess out of any vacation. It started when I arrived at Logan Airport. I got off the plane and called my mom. She was just coming off the bridge....
Samoa Stories: Where the Streets Have No Names
In American Samoa, the streets have no names. Not officially, anyway. Sometimes people refer to “the main road”, which crosses the island, or “the airport road”, which leads to the airport. Sometimes roads are...
Late Night Thoughts on Sixth Street
Even though Dallas is a bigger city than Austin, I feel like I just fell off the hay wagon when I walk down Sixth Street on a busy Saturday night. I also feel old,...
Radio Prizes
As a teenager in the late 1990s, I got all my music from the local alt rock station: 92.1 The Edge. Like every other radio station, The Edge had a lot of contests and...
I Killed the McDLT: My 4th Grade Petition
As a kid back in the 1980s, I loved McDonald’s, like most of my peers. This was back when McDonald’s was a treat, and not just a lazy way out of making dinner. And...
Rock Climbing
Last week, I went to a rock climbing gym with my friends who climb every week. Unlike them, I am overweight and out of shape. I strapped up and clipped into the belay. Then...
Pirate Ophthalmology: The Treatment for Amblyopia
I used to blame the eye doctor for my bad vision. You see, I was born with amblyopia, which is a fancy way of saying “lazy eye”. From what I understand of ophthalmology (which...
